a scintillating sunday - the alli version

"The husband is the pillar of the family. The wife is the caregiver."
"The husband is the one who makes the decisions. The wife only gives suggestions."
"If your suggestion will not be considered when the decision is made, don't feel bad, wives."

These, and more, were the words uttered by the female speaker during last Sunday's pre-cana seminar. Traitor! She not only made it clear that the wives should be utterly subservient to the men, she also implied that if the wife is not good in bed, the husband will look for satisfaction somewhere else. And she made it sound like a given fact! Can you believe that?!?!?!?!?!?!

I honestly felt like throwing the plastic chair I was sitting on at that turncoat! If Toni wasn't gripping my hand and reassuring me that he didn't believe a single word... I don't know what I would have done. Good thing we let her words pass through the other ear... but what about the other couples listening to her? What impact did that seminar have on them?

The only reason I did not so much as breathe during that seminar, like our other participative classmates, was that I did not want to prolong the agony of having to listen to another horrid word. And because I have never been one to just sit there and keep my opinions to myself, this blog is the outlet, and you are my audience.

The husband is not the ONLY one who makes the decisions. Decisions should be made by both husband and wife. It should be a meeting of the minds and a consideration of all factors that affects all parties. If the husband and wife have a child, and the child is of the right mind to decipher right and wrong, then the child should be involved in the decision-making process as well. Whatever affects the family, each of the family members have to be part of the final say. Not only the husband, nor only the wife.

The husband alone cannot be the pillar of the family. It needs to be both husband and wife as well. When you have a roof, you do not just put up one pillar to support it. You need at least two, preferably four, right? Architect, tell me I'm wrong, and I'll retract this statement. Can a roof stand with only one pillar? Yeah... if it's the size of your monitor.

My point is that when I made the decision to marry, I did not just make it myself. Toni was involved. And so it goes that everything in your married life has to involve the two of you. It's a partnership, a collaboration. And who better to collaborate with than your best friend, your other half, your confidante.

And if my husband is not satisfied by my performance in bed and looks elsewhere, he knows his dingdong will be fed to our son's pet turtle, Ninja.

final dose:
We were asked, "What is Love?" They said it's a mystery. They said it's when you sacrifice. They said it's blind. Love is not blind. It sees, but it doesn't mind. So sue me for being trite.


posted by A.Cortes on 9:33 PM under


iamkaith said...

nge, she actually said that?? traditional kaau na oi. i believe they should get somebody not only well-versed on the topic, but also open-minded. it makes me dread the time when it's gonna be our turn. hehe.

toni said...

good luck sa inyong turn. you might want to warn your husband beforehand.
ahehe =)

Anonymous said...

omg i cannot believe there are still people who think that way! do they have job interviews for speakers like that? like is there a questionnaire they fill out in multiple choice that goes

Your husband is sleeping with another woman. You think:
a. you are not good in bed
b. you did not make him a good breakfast this morning.
c. you did not iron the collar of his workshirt good enough.
d. all of the above.

as in. makalagot oi. btw, I liked that line "he knows his dingdong will be fed to our son's pet turtle, Ninja." he he, you go girl!

dr tes said...

wa siya kuyapi! asa ka nag-pre cana? congratulations on your church wedding! im soo happy for you! congrats pud di ay ni Toni!

alli said...

thanks for the support, ladies. this seminar was in Gethsemane Parish. and i personally believe it to be a disgrace that the Catholic Church supports antiquated and completely fallacious ideas such as this horrid woman had. i am so glad that my husband does not believe in any of these!!!


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